HONEY I’M HOME…………By Asimplejoy
So I was talking to this guy last night and we were talking about relationships. And I asked him when was his last relationship? He told me when he first moved to the area he dated this girl for about 6 months and she wanted a relationship but he wasn’t ready because he had just relocated. So I said after her I bet the next chick became your girlfriend and I am willing to bet that it was quick. He was like actually it was I just woke up one day and we were in a relationship. And this was maybe 3 months Iater….WOW!!! I told him that it is pretty funny how you can have one chick that is down for you and all she wants to do is make it official. But on the other hand the other chick wants the same thing but she kept it on the hush hush and she is the one that ends up being your lady. What baffles me is ……what’s the difference between the two women? Just because the other woman didn’t say anything and didn’t mention it you automatically make her your girl? How many people have just “woke up” and were in a relationship? Do people really say “I want you to be my man or woman?” Or is it assumed?
15 comments:
I don't feel that it was because one woman said she wanted a relationship and the other didn't. I believe it's more of a case where he's not into that 1st lady. It has been plenty of times where I have been single and talking to females and everyone gets the i'm not ready for a relationship speech then I have a woman next week or month. It's more of a being nice thing. I don't want to hurt anyones feelings and just say Hey...I'm not that into you!!!
I don't think the women are the same at all, the girl he kick with is just that, she is the one to pass the time with, but when he is ready then he has his heart open. I think a man just have to make up his mind that he is ready and he will find someone. I think it has more to do with men being able to find a worthy woman much more quicker than women to find a worthy man...
I understand the whole "I am not that into you" but I really feel like that isn't the only reason why things happen the way they do. I think there are more factors at play. Because what happens when he chooses B over A and realizes that he should have chose A..........???? I think sometimes people in general don't want to feel pressured to make a decision. Or there are a ton of people dating people that they are just not that into??? How else can you explain the massive consensus of women saying "He just won't commit"..........PEACE OUT!!!
But the one he is passing the time with more that likely he's not into her like that he just wants to be her friend because she's not on his radar as far as what he expected to be with in life. As far as the B over A then realizing he should have went with a is mostly he's either looking at the looks or what she has and getting things wrong and not looking at the total package. The Massive Consensus of Women quote "I probably shouldn't be saying this as a man" but Hey you giving up the goods and he's not willing to holdout and wait let's him know that hey I can do this as long as she allows me to. So most men continue in that attitude and get theres and still do whatever else they want because they have no commitment.
Why are you baffled?
The difference is he wanted to be with the second girl, but not the first.
I was baffled because he explained no true difference between the two ladies besides the fact that he told her he was not ready at the time, but 3 months later he was???
Call me an optimistic realist I guess I feel there is more to it than "Just Not Into You" but I am not arguing the fact that this is sometimes the issue..........I feel a woman or man was "something to you" before they become nothing!!!......
Because us as (men) we do it on our time not anyone elses time..
@Antdog I totally agree because until you are ready it doesn't matter who you have it just won't work.........Now that is answer I can accept........LOL
I feel that you can not put every situation in the same category. Each person have a different set of values and personality. You have to deal with the situation the best you know how as it all is a process.In response to why men may choose one woman over another, my opinion is he may see that strength he lacks in the other chic in which would bring balance to his life. Moreover, I feel men will do what is best for them. Some may need a woman that is strong, optimistic, fun, and outgoing, while others may need a woman that makes him feel that he is needed around,(which all of them do) more soft spoken, but firm. As with your children,they all have different personalities, so you will treat them all accordingly to what they gravitate to (same with men; while all along you are being you). I firmly believe as you stand the test of time to get to really know your friend/mate and not make it complicated, your gut instinct will tell you when he is just not that in to you. As my friend tells me, deep down inside you have the answers right in your face. He is not lying, I guess that is why I am still hanging in there.
Amen Carmeldoll.
I agree with Asimplejoy, most times this is the same man that comes crawling back after the chick he dated saying how great you are. It has happened to me several times, what's up with that, son?
Sometimes we give the opposite sex too much power.........I mean really just be you and if they don't like it then it was there lost!!!! It really isn't that complicated
Its just life. Hindsight is 20/20. For every man that lets that previous woman go and finds another woman and then crawls back to the last one, there is a man who leaves that previous woman and finds a better woman and is so glad he left the previous one alone...
Women Are From Venus, I agree with you that one it's just life. Sometimes that's just the way it is...it's fortunate and unfortunate situation depending on what side you're on....
It'sMeAnthony, Ant B and Women Are From Venus, you guys should write something for the blog.
e-mail me if you're interested.
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